The Daily News

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Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Auld Lang Syne

I realized in the craziness of putting together the Creme de la Creme that December was going to pass without a Virtual Lushary and that cannot happen because this is not only the final Lushary of the year--2007--but it is the final Lushary of the Year--12 months since the Lushary threw open its doors and I started pouring invisible drinks.

Unfortunately, I'm also madly reading over 120 entries (and more keep coming in) and writing blurbs so I'm setting up all the invisible alcohol bottles on the counter along with an instant espresso machine and other beverages and you can come in, help yourself, pour drinks for others, and enjoy each other's company. It's a week for checking in on each other and leaning on each other for support or celebration.

So I raise a bottle of beer to you and sing (in a drunkin' warble):

Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
and never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
and auld lang syne?

And surely ye’ll be your pint-stoup!
And surely I’ll be mine!
And we’ll take a cup o’ kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.

Next month will be a huge celebration of us--a catch-up of where you were in life when the Virtual Lushary doors opened. We'll have our own award ceremony with the Creme de la Creme where everyone in the community is celebrated. Today is simply for taking a break from Christmas, taking a break from family time, checking in and letting everyone know where you are in life. Some people are finally having the Christmas they've always wanted. Others thought this year would be different and they are holding their breath in fear. Still others are sadly looking around the room and thinking, "when the hell will it be different?" And some of us are not celebrating Christmas at all and are just sending out good thoughts to friends who we know are going through a hard time.

As always, it has been just about a month since we met, bitched, cried, comforted, and caught up each other on our cycles and lives. Pull up a seat and I'll pour you a drink. Let everyone know what is happening in your life. The good, the bad, the ugly. My only request is that if a story catches your eye, you follow it back to the person's blog and start reading their posts. Give some love, give some support, or laugh with someone until your drink comes out of your nose.

I have a ton of assvice in my back pocket and as a virtual bartender, I will give it to you unless you specifically tell me that this is simply a vent and you do not want to receive anything more than a hug.

So if you have been a lurker for a while, sit down and tell us about yourself. Remember to provide a link or a way for people to continue reading your story (or if you don't have a blog--gasp!--you can always leave an email address if you're looking for advice or support. If not, people can leave messages for that person here in the comments section too). If you're a regular at the bar, I'll get out your engraved martini glass while you make yourself comfortable. And anyone new, welcome. I'm glad you found this virtual bar.

For those who have no clue what I'm talking about when I say that the bar is open, click here to catch up and then jump into the conversation.

Happy Drinking. Keep sending your links for the Creme de la Creme. I'll trying to get everything that comes in on the list in time, but if not, it will be up a day or two after the list posts in January.


Tracy said...

I'm here! I'll have a vodka and lemonade, please (which, incidentally, is what I'm drinking IRL right now, too...)

My MIL is in town for Christmas, and I am an intruder in my own home.

Thanks, Mel, for letting me know I'm not alone.

Jen said...

I've got another week before I can test again so I have been drinking sparkling cider. I just can't believe this year is passing without a baby or a baby-to-be. But whining and company makes me feel better. I don't know what I would do without all of you.

Lori said...

Just had the crappiest Christmas of my life. I want to run away.

I know I'll feel differently tomorrow, but for now pour me a triple.

Anonymous said...

I'll belly up to the bar, but I'll stick with hot tea with honey to nurse my cold and this slow 2ww. such a crazy time. part of me is so hopeful for what could be, but there's also part that's absolutely terrified of what might not... I've tried not to go there so I'm not even sure I can articulate it yet.

I imagine others have felt the same way, and it is comforting to know I am not alone. thanks mel for creating this space. hope 2008 has good tidings for all. cheers! ~luna

SarahSews said...

Since Mel is busy I'll pour a vodka and lemonade for tracy, a sparkling cider for Jen (good luck), a triple of Mel's famous pomogrante something-or-other, and hot tea for Luna. I'm having hot water with lemon and trying to get to bed soon and ignore the absolute disaster upstairs. We hosted my family this year and it was 10 adults and four kids (six weeks to almost 3 years old), and it was crazy.

Christmas was more hectic than I imagined when I offered to host in August. I was hoping it would give us a distraction after our trip to paris in October. Instead, a brand new surprise pregnancy awaited us on our return and we haven't had much time to prepare for our hosting duties or even to make and buy gifts. I'm thrilled beyond belief to be almost 12 weeks pg, but boy it did a doosy on me today.

In other news, in the last two days we found out that my SIL is also 12 wks pg, with her second. She has a 2 y.o., is over 40 and concieved her second in six months. And she is due 3 days before me. I'm more bitter than I would have expected (I thought being pg would have cured me of the bitterness!), but all I can think about is how hard and long we tried and how easy it has been for her. Grrrr. And she scooped me -- I can't even have a child without having to share that moment with someone else.

We also found out my brother's wife is due 7 weeks after I am. I am thanking my lucky stars that I have my own pg to be excited about or I'd be lost while yet again everyone around me is pg.


May said...

My husband and I just hid this Christmas. We stayed home all by ourselves, in our pyjamas, and watched telly and ate our heads tight off. It was the most relaxing Christmas Day I can remember.

Meanwhile, my very very annoying body keeps pretending to ovulate, and then a day or two later admitting that it didn't actually, just kidding! Heh heh. It's getting to the point were I'm actually longing for February (was going to be January, but everything's messing me about, so why not the Assisted Conception Unit too?), when I'll be put on Provera and then Clomid, just to beat some sense into my idiotic misfiring ovary.

I'll have a coffee please. And pate on toast, and blue cheese, and something involving raw eggs. So there.

Anonymous said...

I am feeling the post holiday sadness begin to wash over me. Another year without a baby. Another year of my Grandmother slipping away.
Could I have something warm & comforting...and maybe a shoulder?

Io said...

Hey Cali, I know you're in your not-actually-2-2ww, but here's some of my warm spiced Glögg if you want it. Otherwise I'd be happy to make you a chai. (A real loose leaf tea chai, not that crap at St@rbucks.)

I'm just sitting here back at work trying to figure out how much money we spent on Christmas that we could have been saving for fertility treatments.

MLO said...

I'm in my 2WW and have vowed not to POAS. Since my tummy is very upset and I don't know how to interpret that.

I have my 2nd beta (and when I get results) on the 28th.



Schatzi said...

Something warm and cidery for me, please.

Had a great Christmas and looking forward to a relaxing week with the parents.

But January brings the beginning of my Mega-Thaw cycle and I don't know if I am prepared... or if I ever will be. *sigh*

Cece said...

A manhatten. Or 7. I've quite possibly had the shittist two weeks ever (miscarraige after IVF, D&C that was delayed 6 hours, leaking roof, backed up main line to septic, got car stuck in a snow bank, broke the snowblower getting the car out of the snow bank... I think you are getting the idea). I would like to be in a coma until my next cycle.

loribeth said...

Well, since it's morning as I'm reading this (at my mom & dad's for the holidays), I'll start the day off with a nice champagne & orange juice. It's been a weird Christmas, although it's turned out allright in the end. First, the threat of bad weather on this end made us wonder if we were going to get here OK. We did. However, first my sister & then her boyfriend came down with the stomach flu, meaning they were not able to come for Christmas Eve -- which in our family involves a big dinner, church & then opening our presents. In 45+ Christmases, my parents, sister & I have always been together... it's one thing not to have any small children around (when we've never had them to begin with), but not to have each other around after 45+ years is something else entirely. And how weird that dh & I have battled snowstorms, freezing rain, etc., for the past 20+ years & always managed to get here, only to have my sister miss Christmas because of the flu??! My dad & dh drove into the city to get her on Christmas morning (an hour's trip) -- her boyfriend was still too sick to come -- so we had one of my dad's famous brunches, opened all our gifts & then had our turkey dinner in the evening.

Cheers & hugs to all.

Dreamer4agift said...

I'm not really here for a drink, just wanted to enjoy the company.
My Christmas went very well. Lots of time spent with family and my niece and nephew are the highlight of my day anytime I'm around them.
On another note, though, tomorrow is my first RE appt and I'm scared. You'd think after the past few years of ttc that I'd be used to the unknown. But I hate it. Just a reminder, too, of how I've failed as a natural woman.
OKay, nevermind, I'll just go behind the bar and make myself a rum and coke.

Meghan said...

Another lesson I've learned from infertility--making it through the holidays sober is no easy task. I'll take a big ol virtual glass (ok, bottle if you insist) of wine.

4dpiui here, with my best response yet and DH's best numbers yet so it's really hard not to get hopeful.

thanks for the drink, and for the note I kept in my back pocket all day!

Zee said...

Hey Mel! How about a Bailey's? A BIG Bailey's. Maybe TWO big Bailey'ses? In fact, if there's a kind of Bailey's with extra sugar and cream (and even added caffeine) I'll have that instead. This CD3 marked my highest FSH ever. Like, "Girlfriend, pack it in and start raising poodles" high. (Nevertheless, Dr Options, bless his little heart, still hasn't given up on me! Crazy, right?) Needless to say, since that news came in I've been SOO off eating (and drinking) healthy. In fact, lately I've been inhaling my weight in sugar, wheat, caffeine, wine, etc. After two years of being good and not a SINGLE freaking thing to show for it, what's the point of depriving myself? (Okay, alright. You know I'll be back on track in the new year--but I just need to be dramatic and pissy right now. Don't look at me like that. Dude, I EARNED it!)

Oh, and did I mention that the day before I got the stratospheric FSH news, my car was hit and may be totalled (even though--Thank God--both I and the woman who hit me walked away without a scratch)? So, after you're all done drinking, can somebody please just drop the piano (or the anvil, whichever) off the highrise onto my head and get it over with? The suspense is killing me.

Ally said...

Hmm...I'd like something fizzy and fun...Maybe a champagne cocktail? (Although it's not quite New Year's Eve yet.)

Nothing new or exciting to report from here. Just waiting, waiting, waiting until February when I can cycle again. Sigh. I thought a little break would be good for me. Now that I'm in the middle of the break, I think it's actually worse.

Heather said...

Ah, no drink for me - but something for a hangover? I drank yesterday, heavily. BigP worked all day so I was home alone. Our third Christmas trying and still not pregnant. Oh, hell...pass me a drink.

KatieM said...

I'll have a pomegranate martini, thanks ;) I had a breakdown moment last week about the twins and about this whole infertility crap...but honestly Christmas with the nieces and nephews was good. I'm 14dpo today and very excited about my temp drop and having the ability to start my next medicated cycle.

Cibele said...

I am back. I haven’t been here for a while. I can't drink so I’ll have some Sparkling water. I am 22 weeks PG (after almost 3 years trying) and terrified. My last scan showed a Choroid plexus cyst (CPC) on my baby's girl head. Every thing else looked good, but it can still be a soft marker for trisomy 18. I am having a level 2 sono Jan 7. I hope that everything is okay with her. I hope that everybody had a great Christmas!

LJ said...

I'm saddlin' up with my favorite barmaid - pour me a cosmo please! I'm just bitchin' that I am not blogging about this cycle right now. It's keeping me from obsessing, which is good - but - IT'S KEEPING ME FROM OBSESSING which is just not fun. So there.
5dp3dt for those keeping score at home.

Michell said...

I'm going to have a couple of mudslides (literally tonight, they're in my fridge) and try to relax in my last few days of BCP's. I'm trying not to stress too much about the upcoming IVF and to remain positive.

From Here To Maternity said...

I would like a spicy Caesar. This has not been the worst Christmas, but it's right up there with my not so pleasant ones. After a total melt down regarding my last IUI attempt I am gearing up to stop my BCPs and stat my injects in January. I've been a right bonehead this year, let's hope my brain makes a comeback in 2008. Make that two Caesars.

Paz said...

Wow, last lushary of the year. I'll have a cucumber Martini. mmmmm. They are so delicious that when I have one I say, I could drink these all night long. But, alas, truth is I would fall over after the second. But here at your virtual dreams can come true. So, just keep pouring.

Happy Lushary Anniversary, Mel and to all of us!

Jess said...

Here's to you and all your wonderful ideas, Mel.

For's to 2007...and for those still waiting, here's to 2008.

sassy said...

Just got off of the 2ww after my first iui : nada. Make mine a triple and make it strong.

A.M.S. said...

I don't particularly care what's in my glass. After the past week anything is fine. My advice to everyone is never get admitted to the hospital on a holiday weekend!

The stress of Thursday's PROM scare has faded some, now it's just a constant low level of fear and a straining for each new milestone, the next doppler check, the next sonogram. We celebrated reaching 23 weeks yesterday, now we're anxiously awaiting 24 weeks when we can start the steroids. Fortunately, the twins are weathering all of this much better than Mom and Dad are. The words of encouragement from the internet have been a huge help, though.

Here's hoping we all have the 2008 we've been wishing for.

Denise said...

This is my first visit to the lushary and I'm very excited to be here. Thanks for the invite!

I've weathered the Christmas holiday relatively unscathed and getting ready to begin our second FET cycle. Excited and terrified at the same time. Since I'll soon be avoiding alcohol and caffeine (at least for a couple of weeks), please pour me a honking huge glass of Jack and Coke.


ms. c said...

I'll take one of everything, since it's all imaginary. Man, I miss me the booze! And I'll treat everyone to another of whatever they are having.
Just stopping in to give love to everyone wherever he or she may be along the IF road.
May we all have our dreams come true in 2008.

Ann said...

It's been a while since I've been here, so a chocolate martini, please, while I give the two-sentence version of where I've been and where I am...

I was happily pregnant, but found out at the 20-week scan that our baby had no kidneys or bladder and couldn't live, so we decided to induce labor and our son was stillborn. Now, I'm enjoying the triumphant return of AF (really!) while I'm waiting for the opportunity to start treatment again--probably in February.

Whew! That's a mouthful. Thanks for the drink, Mel.

Alyson & Ford said...

Your stories are so heart warming and heart wrenching. We celebrate with champagne and always on Sundays!
We continue our Groundhog day in the IA arena. What a wait!
Keep the good will towards all others especially family, and beginning a new year with de-cluttering in mind....
Have a great end of the year!

LID 01/27/06