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Latest Post on BlogHer: Parenting after Infertility.

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Thursday, August 17, 2006

Friday Blog Roundup

Since sometimes my T.C. tends to come early (damn that luteal phase defect!), I thought I'd throw the Friday Blog Roundup out on Thursday in its honour. Or I'm finally getting to go on a short vacation. One or the other. You decide the excuse.

Calling all males--or females with husbands who can do a write-up for Operation Heads Up... We need a bunch of write-ups for male surgeries/procedures including testicular biopsy, vasography, and varicocelectomy (plus anything else I'm missing). We also need a write-up for IM injections. Any takers? Email me at if you can write it. Click on the link for Operation Heads Up in order to see the format if you're not familiar with it already.

Which brings us to what others are thinking about this week...

At Miss E's Musings, the lovely Ellen discusses a conversation that crept up on her without warning--one that I discussed a bit yesterday. She and her husband have decided to set some limits, move onto a different path, and take a break while they collect themselves. And I think the synchronicity that occurs in that conversation and the admittance that they are at the end of their rope show so much strength in their marriage. It's a hard step, one that brings with it perhaps more mourning than a negative beta. I'm wishing them a lot of clarity and I hope a new path opens for them with bright lights shining down on it. Like those big, honking, parking lot lights so you can see every step of the way.

In a similar vein, over on IVF and ICSI, they've decided to continue doing a few more FET cycles while they start work on an adoption from China. She has a beautiful part of her post where she talks about how they wondered if they would be able to bond to a child through adoption. But then she watched the videos of people being brought together with their child for the first time. And she realized how emotional she could get for other couples which is just a fraction of how much love is going to be pouring out of her heart during her own process. She talks about all the steps and how she will become more and more bonded to this child. And I think it's a great post for anyone who is still in the "consideration zone."

If you think after that last post that I am little Miss Buzzkill, check out the comment given to GZ by her nurse on GZ's blog, Gravida Zero. I'm always a bit blown away by comments made within fertility clinics by people who work closely with those going through infertility. Day in, day out, you see people coming through the doors of your clinic in emotional pain. By this point in your career, you would think they would have at least created some pat comments of hope (I know what you're thinking--I just said yesterday that I didn't want happy smoke blown up my bum by Ali Domar and now I'm asking all clinic nurses to blow happy smoke up my bum). Beyond the rude thoughts of her nurse, she was "outed" by a family member. Which requires a whole different post on my end--being in or out and with whom. But all in all, a tough week for Ms. GZ. Head over there and wish her luck in the 2ww. I hope she proves that nurse wrong. If she does, I'll send my ninja nurse practioner to kick her ass.

Lastly, over at Come Undone, the INS form and homestudy application packet is out of her hands and in the loving care of UPS. She has two posts this week about her neighbour reference--choosing which neighbour and then getting to know the neighbour better. Reading her post made me pause and think who I would use as my neighbour reference. I have one person I would consider a friend on the street. And a bunch of people I would call if there was a cricket in the house that needed capturing (I wanted to write "killing" but every cricket is a Mommy cricket's baby. And it just feels karmically better to say "capture"). I understand why they ask for a neighbour reference, but it's just a bit of salt in a wound if you think about it. Anyone can naturally conceive a baby or use A.R.T. without anyone vouching for their home life. But once you open the door to adoption, it becomes a system of weighing your worth. And it makes me sad. I want what is best for the kids, but it also makes me sad. And frustrated. And makes me wonder what the neighbours would say. She's quiet. She has a small garden. She checks her mailbox around 2 p.m. every day.

Have a wonderful end-of-week. We'll be back mid-weekend for more thoughts on infertility as well as commentary on sunburn.


Emmie said...

Hi Ladies,

Just found your blog and I think it's great what you are doing. Would you please add my blog to your list under male factor or combination? It's

My husband isn't having any of the procedures done that you're looking for, but if you need a male perspective on other things, like ICSI, perhaps I can talk him into it. I think he's willing to share.


Anonymous said...


I think this blog is amazing! It has helped me through some very sad weeks this summer. I love the idea of the bracelets. They create a sisterhood, a community, a very important thing in the land of IF -which can be a very lonely place at times.
In fact, I love the bracelets so much that I am taking the Pomegranate symbol even further. Ralph Lauren actually has made a paint colour called Pomegranate (you can see it on his website)!! I plan on painting our bedroom this colour!! Can't hurt right....