Now with edits!
Here's a little question to kick off your weekend (because I have a theory about the answers): what is your two-week-wait or your BFN comfort food? The thing you want to eat even though it really doesn't erase the pain of infertilty, but you believe nonetheless that you will feel better (or at least not worse) after eating it? It can be a specific dish from a restaurant or something homemade. Or out of a can (really? Is your secret comfort food canned potatoes too?). Though it may seem pretty self-explanatory, give as much detail as possible in your description. Is the food hot or cold? Is it a family recipe or one from a book? Did you first eat this food in a certain place? For example, my comfort food is vegetarian pho from a Vietnamese restaurant that we used to go to every Saturday. And I order it with extra noodles and tofu, but without cauliflower or mushrooms. See--in order to prove my theory, I need it as specific as possible. And hey, if you have any good recipes, send them along :-) Oh--and one last note: it doesn't have to be what you actually eat every cycle. It can be what you wish you were eating. So if you once ate some fantastic malawach at a Yeminite restaurant in Jerusalem, and you wish you could have it again because you think it would make you feel better as you lounge on the sofa staring at the ceiling, tell me about it. You are also allowed to list more than one meal if narrowing it down to one is stressing you out... All food will be psychoanalyzed in a post later this week.
And now, a little summary of just a few of the cool things I read this week:
Zee is in the process of tricking her ovaries and you can read about her methods at This is NOT What I Ordered. Hopefully, letting the sperm show up without giving the eggs any warning will do the trick. Good luck, Zee!
May of Nuts in May has a post this week about receiving her husband's SA results. After the panic of seeing the first part of a text message (and only scrolling down to read the rest of it after the fact), she ends the post with this last thought: "You know what I think it is? I think it’s because I never ovulate. H’s sperm have nothing to aim for. They’re demotivated." Hang in there, May. I wish the results were better. Here's hoping for small changes yielding big results.
K77 of Scarred Bellybutton has a post titled "Guilt." It is a beautifully written list of all the ways infertility has made her feel guilty--from her current inability to give her son a sibling (I use the term "current" because I am hoping this will change for you, K77) to the money spent on treatments. And while I know I know I know my mother has a problem with the word "guilt," her words really echoed for me and probably will for many a stirrup queen.
An emotion probably as equally familiar to the stirrup queen is jealousy. Furrow at Seed Disperal Mechanisms has a brave post about wanting a sister in the trenches. It's not that she would wish infertility on anyone, but she wants a friend during this journey. And when someone confided that they had a uterine anomaly and had fears about their ability to get pregnant, how could she not grasp onto that idea and feel doubly crushed when this aforementioned woman becomes pregnant prior to her wedding? It's a good post and one that, again, echoed with me.
Lastly, if you are seeking some distraction during the two-week-wait (or an equally stressful time period), head over to Painting Chef and her mix tape project. Wracking your brain to remember what was playing in the car on the way to prom is certainly more fun than staring at that box of pee stick.
Wait! Don't click off of this post without sending me your favourite food for times of high stress--either by leaving a comment or sending me an email (thetowncriers@gmail.com) in case your food choice is so bizarre (peanut butter and bacon sandwiches?) that you must keep it semi-anonymous. There really is a point to this...
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Editing the food rules: it doesn't just have to be comfort during the two-week-wait or during a BFN. Think big when you think comfort food: what would you want delivered to your house if you just suffered a loss? What would you want magically placed on your table once you have a crying baby in the house and need some nourishment? What could be packaged and delivered that would make you feel good without leaving the house? Remember--the more specific the better. Name restaurants. Name brands. Who knows...sushi may begin magically appearing on your doorstep :-)
That said, if you've already posted your food and wish to add to your request now that you've seen this new bit of information, leave another comment. I'll add it to the list. Really--there is a point to this question...
Friday, January 26, 2007
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OK you asked.
Comfort foods during 2WW:
spaghetti and meatballs with a red sauce preferrable with big chunks of tomatoes; any chocolate (milk, with almonds, in a cake), and chocolate cannolis.
For the BFN:
All the things I'm not to touch during the 2WW...wine (reisling or pinot grigio) and a large iced cafe au lait.
Peanut M&Ms.
Okay, I'm very curious to see where you'll be going with this, but my go-to food is a crabcake sandwich. Buttery and warm, not spicy at all, with just a little bit of sauce, lettuce and tomato, on a toasted roll. And french fries. I don't make them on my own, it's something I want to go out and eat. For some reason, they just always make me feel full and content.
the food I can get here is chips and salsa from a local joint....the chips are nice and warm and crisp. the salsa has a great flavor, few chunks, and just enough spice cause I don't want it hot.
A food I always want and never get is my mother's potato salad. Yum. Not sure how she makes it but it is good hot or cold...
I hate to say this but it's :
McDonald's Cheesburgers
I think it's just a psychological link between childhood and something so bad for me that gets me through the 2WW.
I relish every last bite of the 2 I allow myself.
*Hiding in shame*
Baked mac and cheese....the good stuff....
1/2 box elbow macaroni
6 TBS margarine
3TBS flour
1-1/4 cups milk
1-1/4 parmesean cheese
1/3 cup bread crumbs
Melt the margarine and add flour and let it brown. Remove pot from heat and add milk. Return to heat and blend flour & milk. Add salt. When sauce thickens add 1 cup of cheese, keep on low for 1-2 minutes. In separate bowl mix 2TBS melted margarine with bread crumbs and rest of cheese. Mix cooked pasta with the sauce in a pan, sprinkle topping and bake @350 for 15-20 minutes.
Tastes better the second day...
I'm a freak: food does not provide me comfort. However, I get incredible cravings for red beers: tap beer with tomajo juice, tobasco and pepper. Unfortunately, the craving is usually there even when the test is negative.
My confession is that food does not bring me comfort. I do however crave red beers during the 2WW: cold draw (doesn't matter what kind) with tomato juice, tobasco and pepper. Of course, I usually have to wait until the negative to indulge.
My confession is that food does not bring me comfort. I do however crave red beers during the 2WW: cold draw (doesn't matter what kind) with tomato juice, tobasco and pepper. Of course, I usually have to wait until the negative to indulge.
Potstickers, otherwise known as Chinese dumplings. I also love spring rolls and anything with curry. Yum!
Just like Piccinigirl prefaced her entry with "I hate to say this," I am too.
I hate to say this, but....My infertility comfort food is a grilled cheese sandwich and french fries from Frendlys. Most assuredly followed up by a happy endings sundae.
BFN food? Sushi. Lots and lots of raw fish.
Kraft macaroni & cheese, blue box, with added sliced american cheese. Completely lacking in nutrition, but warm and creamy and cheesy and something I usually avoid.
Also in the running: Ben & Jerry's Half Baked.
Or a good margarita. With salt.
All items I usually deny myself because they aren't good for me. But neither is a BFN, so there it is.
What I want during the 2ww: wine, pinot grigio.
What I actually eat during the 2ww: anything carb, chocolate, pasta, the only exception being that if I am doing HCG shots, either a trigger or micro shots every 2-3 days, I feel so nauseous I have to be very careful. Sometimes, if I've taken a lot of hormonal drugs, I crave lime, lemon, & citrus...no clue why.
Okay, the 2ww stuff doesn't apply to me anymore, but now that we're into the adoption process, I've gone crazy with eating/drinking things I "wasn't supposed to" when TTC.
I don't think the social workers would approve of the bottles (yes, plural!) of Lindeman's lambic (peach, raspberry, etc.) I consume in a weekend. Before I sound like a total alcoholic, I don't drink during the week...that's what all the alcoholics say, isn't it? :)
I also drink more coffee now than I ever did before. It's to spite my infertility, I believe.
Fun post!
Okay, as requested, here are the comfort foods I'd want delivered:)
Lasagna (my mom makes a spinach lasagna with ricotta, mozarella, parmesan, and feta cheese that is one of my all time favorites)
Any Mexican food: fajitas, enchiladas, quesadillas, chips, salsa, guacamole. YUM
Homemade soups. My grandma makes killer chicken noodle, potato, and vegetable soups. We like to put her chicken noodle soup over mashed potatoes.
I crave sushi like nobody else's business during my 2ww. That and beer.
What I actually ate?
Peaches. I went crazy with them this summer and fall during my FETs... I love them just before they are overripe - so they're juicy and runny and the only way you can eat them is to cut them up. Unless you want to be at work with peach juice running down your arms, slurping away.
And pizza, but that's not a 2ww specific food. I will ALWAYS eat pizza.
a biggole cinnabon with extra frosting.
or anything else with wheat and sugar.
this is a rare indulgence since wheat gives me migraines, but i'm on cd3 here, so it's in the forefront.
Chinese food. Specifically, hot and sour soup followed by Singapore noodles. And, absolutely, delivered. If I had to cook it or collect it myself it would lose its soothing magic.
Thanks for the mention, by the way. Some sweet people have already come over to make supportive remarks.
There's a lot of things in this for me. But there's also, interestingly enough, things I DON'T eat anymore because of infertility.
Comfort Foods First:
Starbuck's Ice Cream. Coffee Almond Fudge. Yesssss.
Red Velvet Cake, homemade.
Rice Crispie Treats, homemade.
Godiva. The G collection. Wow. And the new gold ballotin is good. Or the old standby's...the dark collection or the truffles. But I crave Godiva all the time. Does it count?
I WISH I Were Eating:
Mahi Mahi at Jameson's By The Sea in Kona, Hawaii.
Ono at The Kona Inn in Hawaii.
Snow Crab, anywhere, lots and lots of butter.
An ENORMOUS Mai Tai. Preferrably in Hawaii. Sense a theme?
Things I No Longer Want to Eat. Anyone Want to Take The Rest From My Fridge:
Schwann's Confetti Cake Ice Cream (Ate a lot of it during my 2ww after the failed IVF)
Ben and Jerry's (especially the oatmeal cookie dough one) ice cream, which I ate as my comfort food after losing our baby.
Saltines and Nestle semi-sweet chocolate morsels. Together.
During a particularly anxiety-ridden moment of the last 2ww this was all we had in the house. (well, besides healthy foods, and who wants those?) I found it so satisfying that its become a staple.
Oooh, good question! Mexican food during the 2ww--chicken burritos, cheeze dip, chips and salsa. My theory is that if I AM pregnant, I'll have to stop eating things that would give me heartburn, so I might as well enjoy them now.
After a BFN: sweet tea. I was born and raised in the south, and they just about put it our bottles instead of milk. I usually deny myself sweet tea (and any caffeine) during the 2ww. After the BFN, I spent the next 2 days gulping it down.
Carla
I was going to be embarassed to admit to Kraft Dinner, but twirl beat me to it! That and something with a sidde order of fries works well. Sushi too, as long as I'm not cycling...
I crave spicy carbohydrates - usually Thai noodle dishes. It can be pad thai, or drunkard's noodles, or pad see yew, or some other dish - it just has to be spicy, with lots of rice noodles and deep fried tofu goodness
Nothing is very comforting when I see another bfn, I usually just curl up in bed with my laptop, whatever DVD's we just got in the mail, and a fresh bottle of Mt. Dew. But, my life wouldn't be worth living any day without Mt. Dew, so that doesn't count.
I have been absolutely craving my mom's cabbage turnovers lately. I say "my mom's" but I've never had them anywhere else, and most people look at me like I have 6 heads when I rave about them. I don't know how she got the recipe, I don't know why cabbage baked inside dough is so appealing, I don't know why I have wet dreams about buttering the tops of the rolls when they come out of the oven all hot and soft. But, I want it. So much that nothing else sounds appetizing right now. I'd better get on the phone, we are spending the weekend at her house.
I don't really have a 2ww food, though I do relax my "no fast food" rule if the french fry craving comes to call.
BFN... Sushi. Wine. And though not technically a food, Motrin.
HA! I love Kris's pick of motrin. My BFN fave is alleve, because I deny myself during the 2ww.
Otherwise, strong coffee and any good dark chocolate.
No special cravings during 2ww.
2ww: Raspberry sorbet bars (not to be confused with rasberry beret bars)
BFN: Sushi, wine, sushi, wine, sushi. And wine. Damn that sounds good right about now. It always makes me nuts that the one time you REALLY want (I'd even venture to say NEED) a drink is during the 2ww!
Honestly, my comfort food is Oreos. I can't have them most days, but they were the one bright spot on CD1 - my PCOS diet didn't matter and I could eat as many of them as I wanted. There's a special spot in my heart for them because of this, and I think of them and smile even now.
It depends if I want salty or sweet.
Salty: My spaghetti. Fried onions, Well done--more like burnt. Over spaghetti that has velveeta cheese mixed in. (I'm allergic to tomatoes.)
Sweet: Chocolate chip cookies--mine. and Entenmans cake.
Right after a BFN (or in my case, usually a miscarriage) I have to have a Dr. Pepper (20 ounce, right out of the bottle.)
During the 2WW or in times of extreme sadness (again, usually following one of my many miscarriages) I need DH to buy me Ben and Jerry's (Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough during the 2WW and Cherry Garcia after a loss.) And he is NOT allowed to comment on how few days it takes me to eat it all.
Ok, my ultimate comfort food, though usually not one I go to during the 2ww or even for a BFN is very embarassing to admit. It will sound disgusting to describe and H thinks it's completely gross. I hardly ever make it and it's only when H is gone for the night. And even then, it's just easier to eat cereal.
When I was little if my dad worked nights, my mom would take any left over plain spaghetti and fry it up in a pan till it got brown crispy edges- sort of the lazy man's version of spatzle. And she'd serve it with a side of scrambled eggs. And I'd cover the whole plate with ketchup- because what little kid doesn't like to slather everything with ketchup?
As a total food snob, I know that this is an appalling thing for a grown-up to eat. But I love it- it always reminds me of when I was little and being in the kitchen with my mom.
CHOCOLATE! CHOCOLATE! CHOCOLATE!
Belgium chocs, choc cake, choc pudding, plain choc, ice cream choc, hot choc, choc mousse.
Not all at once, obviously :) :) :)
Oooh, that's got my mouth watering, I'm off to the kitchen...
Pate, red wine and crusty bread. The easiest dinner in the world. Served for two on the back deck with the candles flickering.
Bea
I should add this meal reminds me of a particularly melancholy and bittersweet movie I saw during the time between our first cycle and our first transfer. The movie had themes of non-traditional family-building. After that it became a thing.
Bea
My favorite comfort food was California rolls with masago and Stacey's Cinnamon and Sugar Pita Chips from Whole Foods. I might also let myself get a chocolate chocolate chip cheesecake just because I happened to walk past the bakery cooler. Mmmmmm.... My mouth is watering just thinking about it!
2 Taco Bell burrito supremes and a caramel apple empanada for dessert.
That was my dinner Thursday night after the D&C.
Definitely an alcoholic beverage of some sort.
Nachos with no olives, but with cheese, sour cream, refried beans, beef, salsa, jalepenos. Oh yeah, and of course, if eaten during a difficult time, it has no calories, right? RIGHT?
Maybe a samosa from my fave Indian restaurant.
My comfort foods:
1. Annie's Macaroni and Cheese... made with full fat yogurt and lots of butter.
2. A New York-style pizza from our local pizzeria joint.
3. Smoked salmon roll, a spicy scallop hand roll, and spicy tuna maki from our favorite sushi place in Brookline: Fugakyu restaurant.
There is a Chinese restaurant near my home that used to be part of the Lover's Eggroll chain but they've broken off and now they're called Yummy Eggroll. When I'm down, I have to have the shrimp fried rice, add mushrooms with an order of veggie eggrolls. I prefer to eat it in front of the TV with a glass of white wine or Diet Dr Pepper. Yum...
As someone implanted yesterday i find I am craving potatoes, like fries and mashed and roasted, more so thatn from a can.
I can recommend roasted canned potatoes sprinkled with parmesan prior to the roasting process.
I'm also wanting anything hot and spicy I can get my hands on. So the new Thai Takeaway down the road is going to get a lot of business.
OH! and those fizzy lollies (fruit tingles in Australia)I could live on except they increase the nausea.
I've been racking my brain for days, and all that I can come up with is carbohydrates. It doesn't matter what form they're in. I just want carbs and lots of them.
Oh, and wine.
Ooooooh....
I ALWAYS crave mashed potatoes and gravy when I'm in need of some tlc. Either during the 2ww, or after a BFN, or just when i'm down about IF-always mashed potatoes and gravy.
I normally don't have gravy sitting in the fridge, so I end up making the instant gravy packet (brown of course-the darker the better) and Betty Cro.cker instant potato buds. DELISH. I will eat them by the bowlful. Or, if I'm lazy, I send dh to KFC for a jump size of pots and gravy.
After reading all these comments, I have a very strong desire to eat mashed potatoes and chocolate and get drunk.
But to re-answer after the update- after a loss/miscarriage or a BFN we were really counting on being positive, we always go to a lovely french bistro in Toronto called Provence. It has the most perfect atmosphere, with sun shining through big picture windows, lovely service, wine, and the most delicious food.
Sometimes I go alone for a glass of wine, but I always go when I'm feeling down, and I always feel better.
Other good things, fresh Montreal style bagels with Alex Farms cream cheese & Kristapsons smoked salmon. Something about the contrast between warm bagels and cold salmon, sweet cream cheese and slightly salty smoky fish that just does it for me.
Red Wine. A whole bottle at a time. During a 2WW, I started to bleed on day 10. I was so miserable at the idea of being 40 and facing another IVF cycle. I drank a bottle of red wine on day 10 and another on day 11. On day 12, the thinnest pink link appeared on a stick. I marinated two embryos. The blood was probably from a developing subchrionic hematoma that pleasantly scared the shit out of me later on. Twins arrived at 33 weeks, and thank God they do not have fetal alcohol syndrome.
1. Coca-Cola Slurpee. The big one.
2. Velveeta Shells and Cheese.
3. Grilled Cheese sandwich with a tiny bit of brown spicy mustard and a bowl of tomato basil soup.
How could I forget?
4. Honey-seared chicken from Pei Wei.
I will eat anything, but I just recently found Dove's Give Into Mint ice cream that has chocolate chunks, fudge swirl and a layer of ganache on the top of the container. It is to die for!!!!
http://curvatude.blogspot.com/2007/01/cooking-in-crisis.html
Mine can be found here
Let's see...there are a couple of things that I always turn to when I don't feel well, or when I just need to feel that "hug" that the food brings, whether I'm sick, sad, or just in need of being taken care of.
A grilled cheese sandwich with a bowl of Campbell's Tomato soup and a glass of milk
My grandmother's Brunswick Stew
A bowl of wonton soup from Pei Wei
Actually, most soups will do the trick. Something about being tucked in on the couch with a steaming mug of soup makes me feel little-kid safe.
Leftover Thanksgiving dinner of dressing, potatoes, collards, and turkey (sometimes I like it more the next day...)
And during those painful bfn moments, S always brings me special treats that I normally feel guilty about eating. Usually it's Ben and Jerry's or something from a bakery, gooey and sweet. It isn't so much the WHAT as the fact that he thinks to get me something to fill the empty spot.
My favs:
2WW: Chili's Quesidilla Explosion salad... Love it. Chick-fil-A has a good substitute version of this salad at 1/2 the cost.
BFN: Carb-loaded pasta dishes. The current winner is Chicken and Noodles made with Cream of Mushroom soup in it. MMMMMMMMM! My other fav is Tuna Caserole! Cant spell it, but I love it.
Follow this with DARK chocolate and we're best pals for ever!
Dawn
Hostess Cupcakes, a rasberry mango margarita (the "Big Azz" size--36 ounces, I know, I know) from Tex's Bar, their Pico Bean and Rice Burrito and Jalepeno Beer cheese dip, french fries from Compton's diner, and a Friendly's chocolate Fribble. And a side of US Weekly, Star, and a copy of Overboard. Seriously.
what is a pico bean?
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